Interview with Sheila Walsh

WOF:
Every year you write at least one new book. How do you decide what to write about next?

SHEILA:
Usually I choose a subject that I want to find out more about. There are people who write from a stance of expertise; it’s something they know well, they’ve studied well—someone like Beth Moore. I tend to choose a subject that I feel is almost the next step in my spiritual journey, something that either I feel a lack of in my own life or a hunger for. When it came to the book for this year there were a whole bunch of contributing factors but the main area that I saw God trying to teach me was what it looks like to let go.

I love Psalm 46:10 that says, “Be still and know that I am God.” I’d always interpreted it as “find a quiet place and be alone with God” but when you look at the Hebrew root of “Be still” it means “let go.”

When we take our hands off and stop trying to control we give God an opportunity to show who He is and what only He can do.

WOF:
Who would you say this book is for? Who needs to read it?

SHEILA:
It’s interesting; when we are in our off-season at Women of Faith, I use that as an opportunity to do 2 or 3 of the events I used to do where I go into a small church and work with a smaller group of women. It was very interesting this year—usually I’ll do a women’s conference and maybe stay over and sing in the church service. This year in Columbus, Ohio the pastor asked me if I would do the women’s conference on the Saturday then stay over to speak at all 4 of their church services.

What really blew me away was the response I got from the men as well as the women. It was as varied as a man who must have been in his early 70’s who came up to me and said, “I have been holding on to bitterness for 39 years. Is it too late for me?” I said, “Absolutely not! If you have one breath left in your body it’s not too late to let go of that unforgiveness.”

Another one: a lady came to my book table when I was signing books. She told me that she and her husband—they had been married for over 30 years—had filed divorce papers that week because he had made poor choices and their house had been repossessed two days before the conference. She was the one who had initiated the divorce. She said, “You know what? The one thing I never did was I never let go to see what God might do. I’m going home to tell him, ‘Let’s just see what God might do.’”

What I’m seeing is the response so far is from young girls holding on to things that happened to them when they were small girls, right across the board. It seems to be resonating with men and with women. I guess we all have things, particularly in the times we’re living in, most people are concerned about their jobs, their children, their future. I don’t think I’ve ever been more aware of a time when people are more willing to listen to something that could potentially transform their lives.

WOF:
You said Let Go was a “quest to study and understand what it means as a believer to be delivered.” Did you find out?

SHEILA:
Yes. What was interesting about the process was it began with one Sunday morning looking at my reflection in the mirror and feeling such a heaviness, a sense that life is incredibly difficult and complicated at the moment and I just don’t know what to do. I’ve been a Christian since I was eleven and now I’m 52 but I’ve never in my life heard the audible voice of God. But deep in my spirit, in a very compelling voice, I heard God say, “I will deliver you.” I didn’t know what that meant. It made sense to bring the children of Israel out of Egypt, but what does it mean in my situation? How does that work? What would that look like? As I began to dialogue with the Lord, three things became very clear to me:

1. Because God was speaking, it’s a done deal.
2. I had no idea what it would look like.
3. I had no idea when it would happen.

The whole long process of deliverance was a painful one. When I think of “deliverance” I think of something immediate—Jesus speaks the word and the leper is healed. But this was not like that at all, it was a walking out, day by day facing things that were painful to face. For me the bottom line of what deliverance looked like was God saying to me one night, “You put this down here or you’re stuck.” I let go of trying to protect myself, trying to fix this, trying to work at what tomorrow will look like. I think there are moments in life where we learn great lessons and there are moments in life that are transforming moments. That, for me, was a transforming moment.

WOF:
One hallmark of your writing and speaking is that you’ve been very open about your struggle with depression. In Let Go, you let us in on other struggles with your finances and even your marriage. How hard was it—for you and for Barry—to put all that in writing for everyone to see?

SHEILA:
It was very difficult. Actually it was quite a process. I’d written a large percentage of the book and got to the last couple of chapters on hopelessness and hope. I remember saying to Barry one morning, “I just can’t get a handle on this. Nothing seems to be flowing at all.” He said, “Why don’t you share our story?” I felt it was too raw and too soon.

As a mom, I try to read everything I write through Christian’s ears. When he’s 21 and off at college he’s not going to want me to have shared that he ran around the neighborhood with no diaper on when he was 2. I have a tremendous sensitivity to other people in my family—I learned that in kind of a painful way. When I wrote Honestly, which was the book that talked about my depression, I included things in there about my brother and sister. Not personal things, just things that related to them. My brother, who lives in England, called me one day and said, “Please don’t talk about me in your books.” I said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t think about that since I wasn’t revealing any great dark secrets.” He said, “It’s not that. You’ve chosen to live a fairly public life and that’s just not who I am. I live a fairly private life.” I felt really grieved that I had done something he felt had invaded his privacy. That sticks with me; I’m always aware of that when I write.

So when it came time to write something about Barry it felt like no matter how I tell it, it’s going to be from my perspective. But he was the one who was saying, “God brought me from a place of such despair. There are other people out there like that. I think we should share it.” I became manic about it—every time the manuscript came in for review or for any changes I said, “Read it again. If there’s anything you want to change...” We changed a few things, took out a couple of details, but basically he felt it was something he wanted to do as part of his healing journey. I tremendously respect him for that.

WOF:
A lot of us can identify when you say, “It’s the small stuff that gets me.” Why is that, do you think?

SHEILA:
I think the little things are annoying; they don’t seem noble. There’s something about the great challenges in life that have a certain “call” built into them. It’s almost as if we think OK this is a tough challenge but I believe that somehow through this I’m going to learn something and I don’t think I’ll be the same person when I come through the other side. But little things just seem annoying. They’re like little gnats in our face at suppertime. They’re much harder because we see no redemptive element in little things. We look for redemptive elements in our pain; we think this better be for something good or why did we walk through it? What I’ve discovered in my own life is the little things show me a lot about myself and where I’m at.

WOF:
Why should women come to our 2009 A Grand New Day event?

SHEILA:
I remember thinking this was one of the dumbest titles we’d ever chosen. I didn’t like it at all. Even the fact that it was “grand” and not “brand” new...I thought this is just corny and goofy. I didn’t express that in any great way but I did say to Mary, “You know, I think this is a dumb title.” Now, when I think of where we’re at as a country and the messages we’re all sharing, I couldn’t think of a better title. I think what Christ offers to us this year through the event is an opportunity to put the past down and pick up a fresh set of tools for a grand new day. It’s not just the wonderful truth that with God, His mercies are new every morning. I almost feel as if we’re in a new season, a new time...that God is going to equip us for the days we’re living in. Now I’m very grateful it’s called A Grand New Day.

I’m very grateful for the new people we have; I think the two Lisa’s are going to offer a tremendous amount. Lisa Harper was my Bible study teacher for years when we lived in Nashville. She led a women’s Bible study and whenever she was teaching I never wanted to miss because she was brilliant. I’m just getting to know Lisa Whelchel and I think she has a lot to give.

I expect it to be a spectacular year. I don’t expect to be the same at the end of the year as I am today as I talk to you. I think these messages will dig deep and give us a lot of space and renew us. What I’ve discovered is that, even though as the year progresses I’ve heard Patsy’s messages 20 times at one point, and Marilyn’s, and the music...as we move on, I’m going to be in a different place in June than I’ll be in April. I think there will be fresh things. I really think this going to be a “fresh manna” year where nothing will be the same even from event to event.